Hello Brayden!

Remember how I was saying in my last post that I was feeling a bit guilty for having my last day of work being August 13th leaving me with 2 weeks until my due date? Well, I don't feel guilty anymore! Brayden Kai Neufeld decided to make his appearance into this world 12 days early on Sunday, August 15, 2010, just two days after my last day of work.

On the day of of Brayden's birth, our day started off normally. We slept in and met up with our friends, Becky and Matt, for a dim sum lunch. We hugged good bye after lunch joking about how it might be the last time they see me with a pregnant belly. After lunch Mike and I took our dog, Keiko, to the doggy beach by Vanier Park and spent the afternoon there relaxing in the sun. At around 4pm I thought I felt a bit of a cramp but I wasn't so sure because it was quite faint so I didn't mention anything to Mike. We had made dinner reservations for that evening at the new Boathouse Restaurant on Kits Beach. It was going to be our last nice, romantic dinner out together before the baby arrived. We decided to head back home at around 4pm to start getting ready to go out to dinner. I was really looking forward to our dinner!

By 5pm we had gotten home, Mike had showered and given Keiko a bath and it was my turn to hop into the shower. By this point I had felt a couple of more 'cramps' and I was starting to think that maybe they were contractions. I decided to mention it to Mike (just in case), but I told him they were happening about 20 mins apart so if they were contractions I was sure we still had lots of time because I'd heard you can be in early labour for up to 20 hrs sometimes. I told him I was going to take a shower and I'd let him know if they still kept happening. Well, they did keep happening while I was showering and by the end of my shower I was pretty confident I was having labour contractions - by this time it was about 5:30pm. I told Mike I still wanted to try to go to the Boathouse for dinner, to which he responded that I was mad! Ha ha. We decided to wait another 45 minutes to see how things progressed before we would cancel the dinner reservations. By 6:15pm my contractions had gotten a lot closer - about 5-10 mins apart and they were starting to get a bit stronger. Mike and I decided at this time that we should cancel our dinner reservations and order in take out instead. We ordered in dinner and had eaten it by 7pm. By this time My contractions had now progressed to 3 mins apart and were lasting for approximately 45 seconds each time. I called my midwife at this point and she asked me a bunch of questions. I was still able to talk through my contractions, although they were hurting quite a bit, so she told me to monitor them for another 1/2 hour to an hour and call her back if they got more intense to the point where I couldn't talk through the contractions, they got closer together, or my water broke. After speaking to my midwife we had called my Dad to come and pick up Keiko to look after her when we had to go to the hospital and we'd packed our hospital bags. Almost immediately after I got off the phone with my midwife my contractions started getting a lot more intense. They remained at 3 mins apart but by 7:30pm I was unable to talk through any of my contractions. At 7:45pm my water broke and Mike called my midwife immediately to tell her this and let her know how strong the contractions were now. My midwife told Mike to get me to the hospital right away and told us she'd meet us there in 10 mins. It was go time!

The contractions were really intense by the time I got to the hospital and lasted for at least a minute each. Mike was really calm and supportive the whole time which is what I really needed. We arrived at the hospital at approximately 8:15pm. When my midwife checked me at the hospital she found that I was already 5 cm dilated so we got a private room right away and everything was set into motion quickly. I was in too much pain to walk up to my private room on the second floor of BC Women's Hospital so they got me a wheelchair and wheeled me up. I asked my midwife if she thought I would have my baby the next morning or if she thought it would take awhile until the afternoon and she told me that I was having this baby that night! I was shocked because most of the births I'd heard about went for hours and hours.

Most of my contractions by this point were in my back and they hurt so much. Back labour is not fun! All I remember thinking is 'holy crap, how much more painful is this going to get?!?!' Mike told my midwife that I had expressed many times that I wanted a drug-free birth. I had asked him to do this when I was in labour and to keep reminding me why I wanted a drug-free birth when I was in too much pain to remember. My midwife suggested I try taking a bath to try and relieve the pain of the contractions. I was up for anything to relieve the pain naturally so I hopped into the huge soaker tub in my room. It felt so nice...but it didn't exactly relieve the pain. My midwife asked me if I wanted to have a water birth in the tub, to which I responded 'no'. I thought to myself 'what kind of hippie do you think I am?' and that there was no way I'd be giving birth to a baby in a bath tub. I wondered what I would be like in labour - would I be very vocal, a screamer, or super quiet - well, I found out that I turn very quiet. I found myself whispering because I was afraid that if I was too loud it would make the pain hurt even more. I asked everyone not to talk to me when I was having a contraction and shushed them if they tried. Mike thought this was pretty funny. I had no idea how long I had been in the tub and just kept finding myself wondering how long I'd have to go through this before the baby was born. I was 10 cm dilated pretty soon after I was sitting in the tub. I asked my midwife if the contractions were going to get worse and she said they probably wouldn't get any more painful. I also really wanted to know how much longer I'd have to be in labour but obviously she couldn't really give me a time. It felt like the contractions never really went away in between. I felt like I had constant contractions in my back that dulled a bit between contractions but would never fully go away. It was tough. I told my midwife a few times that I thought I needed something to help with the pain but she respected my original wish for a drug-free birth and refocused me on working through each contraction. She told me I could try the gas but I couldn't wrap my head around trying to focus through each contraction, trying to steady myself in the tub, while holding the gas mask and breathing in, so I didn't bother trying it. Mike was putting cold towels on my head, massaging my shoulders, and fanning me throughout the labour. He kept encouraging me and telling me that I was doing really well. He was such a great support. When it got close to the point where I was going to have to start pushing my midwife told me that I had to get out of the tub and move to the bed if I didn't want to give birth in the tub. Well, the thought of this was unimagineable. In my mind, there was no way I could get out of the tub and make it all the way over to the bed 10 ft away while going through contractions so I told the midwife that I was going to stay in the tub and have a water birth! My midwife and the nurse were really excited about this because not many women opt for a water birth. Soon after this I started feeling the sensation to push and my midwife guided and coached me expertly. It was such a comfort hearing her coaching and having her focus me on what I had to do. I pushed for what felt like quite awhile and my midwife continued to coach me and tell me how well I was progressing. To be honest, it didn't feel like I was doing anything to move things along when I was pushing and I secretly felt like my midwife was lying to me - but of couse she wasn't. I had heard from many women that the part that really hurts in labour is right before the head comes out when you feel a 'ring of fire' and the head pushes through. I was dreading this part, but to my total amazement I never felt this. I felt nothing when the baby's head came out except relief. It was all so surreal. When the head was out my midwife told me to wait a few seconds because the baby would turn on it's own, at which time I could push again and the shoulders would slide right out. In my head I was thinking 'oh my goodness my baby is going to drown if I don't push right away', but instead I trusted my midwife and did as she said - and of course the baby came out perfectly fine. My midwife put the baby on my chest right away and we checked it out and found that we had just had a baby boy. It was such an indescribable feeling to be holding my baby and I felt the hugest sense of relief to know that I wouldn't feel anymore contractions!

Looking back on that day, I feel really happy about my birth experience. It was such an amazing day and I feel so blessed to have had the experience I had. Mike was absolutely wonderful through my whole pregnancy and labour. I didn't think it was possible to love him any more than I already did, but I was wrong. Now we are enjoying getting to know little Brayden and learning about parenthood.